Laughter Medicine

Ambushed - 3 & 4

2007-05-28T12:28:00.000+05:30

In sequence to my previous posts... dont know where the war will end... enjoy

Ambushed - 2

2007-05-10T15:02:00.000+05:30

I had posted Ambushed-1 some days back and this is the addition to that

Bad luck

2007-05-02T12:06:00.000+05:30

With a pile of 300 résumés on his desk and a need to pick someone quickly, my boss told me to make calls on the bottom 50 and toss the rest.

"Throw away 250 résumés?" I asked, shocked.

"What if the best candidates are in there?"

"You have a point," he said. "But then again, I don't need people with bad luck here."

Ambushed

2007-05-02T11:12:00.000+05:30

Friends

2007-04-17T12:29:00.000+05:30

Mommy Daddy

2007-04-05T11:46:00.001+05:30

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up
something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I
took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.
"Why?" my daughter asked.
"Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's
been, it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration
and asked, "Mommy, how do you know all this stuff? You are so
smart."
I was thinking quickly. "All moms know this stuff. It's on the
Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a
Mommy."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was
evidently pondering this new information. "OH...I get it!" she
beamed, "So if you don't pass the test you have to be the
daddy."
"Exactly" I replied back with a big smile on my face

Alcoholism

2007-04-03T18:51:00.000+05:30

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause : Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the drink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

2. Symptom : The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause : You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause : You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your drink.

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause : You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!

6. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
Cause: You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

7. Symptom: Your wife and everyone else at home are looking funny.
Cause : You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house

Hindi Translations....

2007-03-16T15:03:00.000+05:30

How wud sum common english sayings translate in hindi???

Have a nice day!
----- * Achcha din lo!

What's up?
----- *Uppar kya hai?

You're kidding!
----- *Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!

Don't kid me!
----- * Mera bachcha mat banaao!

Yo, baby! What's up?
-----* Beti Yo, uppar kya hai?

Cool man!
-----* Thandaa aadmi!

Check this out, man!
----* Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!

Don't mess with me, dude.
----- * Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.

She's so fine!
----- * Woh itnee baareek hai!

Listen buddy, that chick's mine, okay!?
----- * Suno dost, woh chooza mera hai, theek?

Hey good looking; what's cooking?
----* Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya pakaa rahee ho?

Are you nuts?
----- * Kya aap akhrot hain?

Son of a gun.
----- * Bachcha bandook ka.

Rock the party.
---- * Party mein patthar feko.

How do you do?
----- * Kaise karte ho?

Keep in touch!
----- * Chhoote Raho.

Lets hang out!
----- * Chalo bahar latakte hain!

Google Earth

2007-03-14T15:08:00.000+05:30

The Ant and the grasshopper

2007-03-13T18:20:00.000+05:30

OLD VERSION...
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

MODERN VERSION...
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house.
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online pe titions seeking support to the grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance).

Opposition MP's stage a walkout.Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.
Arjun Singh makes Special Reservation for Grass Hopper in educational Insititutions & in Govt Services.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by
the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice". Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'. CPM calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden' Koffi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

MANY YEARS LATER...
The ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi billion dollar company in silicon valley.100s of grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in India...

Your Convenience

2007-02-13T14:44:00.000+05:30

Chinese Call Centre

2007-01-24T14:07:00.000+05:30

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?

Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone.You can speak to me. Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someoneand you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wanthat our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is beingsent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look, if no onewas injured and no onewas sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Ree.

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree ..

Caller: Oh ......God!!! !

Dont know the answer... Change the problem :)

2007-01-22T18:14:00.000+05:30

2007-01-16T11:44:00.000+05:30

2007-01-02T13:36:00.000+05:30

They Walk among us...

2006-12-21T17:49:00.000+05:30

A guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too untrusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it.

Caution... They Walk Among Us
====================

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted...."Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said..."where???"

They Walk among us
====================

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which
direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun
waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the
north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and
has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up
with that stuff."

They Walk Among Us

====================

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific.."

They Walk Among Us

===================

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving".

They Walk Among Us

====================

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car : it's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk...

They Walk Among Us

====================

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount on both....

They Walk Among Us

====================

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"...

They Walk Among Us

====================

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.

Normal People

2006-12-13T19:05:00.000+05:30

We think we are all normal isn't it. Wait till u read this

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what is the criteria that defines a patient to be institutionalized. "Well," said the Director, "after we fill up a bathtub, we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask the patient to empty the bathtub"
Here are the choices: Would you use the spoon? The teacup? The bucket? "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup." Noooooo," answered the Director, looking at the visitor with new interest.

"A normal person would pull the plug".

Little Johny thinking

2006-12-13T19:04:00.001+05:30

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher
picked him to answer a question.

"Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and y ou shot one with
your gun, how many would be left?"

"None.", replied Johnny. "'cause the rest would fly away."

"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are
thinking."

Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now.

If there were three
women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one
Licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her
cone, which one is married?

"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"

"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But

I like the way you are thinking.
The Teacher Fainted..

Sardaji and Slippers

2006-12-13T19:02:00.000+05:30

AFRAID THAT SOMEONE WILL TAKE AWAY YOUR SLIPPERS WHEN YOU LEAVE THEM OUTSIDE THE MOSQUE/ TEMPLE? ---
FOLLOW THE SAME METHOD AS THIS
GENIUS SARDAR!--

Good one

2006-12-13T19:00:00.000+05:30

Fun with English

2006-12-11T12:46:00.000+05:30

Spotted in a toilet of a London office:TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW.

In a London department store:BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

In an London office:AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD

Outside a London secondhand shop:WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

Notice in London health food shop window:CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS

Spotted in a safari park:ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR

Seen during a London conference:FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR

Notice in a field:THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES

Message on a leaflet:IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS

On a repair shop door:WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR, THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)

People in other countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists. Here is a list of signs seen around the world.

At a Budapest zoo:PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.

Hotel, Acapulco:THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE.

In a Nairobi restaurant:CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE SHOULD WAIT AND SEE THE MANAGER.

In a City restaurant:OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.

Cool Speech

2006-12-06T15:37:00.000+05:30

A newly wed girl was being welcomed at the husband's home in a traditionalmanner. She was asked to give a little speech. She addressed as follows:

"My dear family members, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home andfamily", she said

"Firstly, with my presence I would not want to create anyinconveniences by my being here. I mean that I don't want you all to changeyour way of life, your routine."

"What do you mean my child?" asked the patriarch of the family.

What I mean dad is:
Those who used to wash dishes must carry on washing them.
Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.
Those who cooked shouldn't stop on my account.
Those who used to clean should clean.

As for me, I am here just to entertain your son!

Call Centres in 2050

2006-12-05T18:54:00.000+05:30

Imagine....

It is 2050 and call centres are opening all Over the West, as the new economic power India Out-sources work to the countries where many jobs Originated. Millions of Americans, still struggling to Adapt to a global economy, are willing to accept jobs That pay them in a new currency sweeping much of the World: Rupees. Some of them, eager to land one of the Customer service jobs from India, are attending Special training sessions in New York City, led by Language specialist Dave Ramsey, who goes by a simpler Name for his Indian clients: Devendra Ramaswaminathan .

On this warm afternoon, the professor is teaching Three ambitious students how to communicate with Indian customers.

Professor: "Okay, Gary, Randy and Jane, first we need To give you Indian names. Gary, from now on, you'll be Known to your customers as Gaurav. Randy, you'll be Ranjit. And Jane, you'll be Jagadamba. Now imagine you Just received a call from Delhi. What do you say?"

Gary: "Name-as-tea ?"

Professor: "I think you mean 'Namaste.' Very good. But What do you say after that?"

Gary: "How can I help you?"

Professor: "You're on the right track. Anyone else?"

Jane: "How can I be helping you?"

Professor: "Good try! You're using the correct tense, But it's not quite right. Anyone else?"

Randy: "How I can be helping you ?"

Professor: "Wonderful! Word order is very important. Okay, let's try some small talk. Give me a comment That would help you make a connection with your Indian Customers."

Randy: "It's really hot, isn't it?"

Professor: "The heat is always a good topic, but you Haven't phrased it correctly. Try again."

Randy: "It's deadly hot, isn't it?"

Professor: "That's better. But your tag question can Be greatly improved."

Randy: "It's deadly hot, no?"
Professor: "Wonderful! You can put 'no?' at the end of Almost any statement. You are understanding me, no?"

Jane: "Yes, we are understanding you, no?"

Professor (smiles): "We may need to review this later. But let's move on to other things. Have you ever heard Indians use the word 'yaar'?"

R andy: "Yes, my Indian friends use it all the time. Just last night, one of them said to me, 'Randy, give Me yaar password. I am needing it to fix yaar Computer."

Professor (laughs): "That's a different 'yaar,' yaar. The 'yaar' that I'm talking about means friend or Buddy. You can use it if you've developed a rapport With a customer. For example, you can say, 'Come on, Yaar. I am offering you the best deal.' Do you Understand, Jagadamba?"

Jane: "Yaar, I do."

Professor (smiles): "Okay, let's talk about accents. If your client says 'I yam wery vorried about vat I Bought for my vife,' ho w would you respond?"

Randy: "Please don't be vorrying, yaar. She vill be Wery happy and vill give you a vild time tonight."

Professor: "Vunderful! I mean, wonderful. You have a Bright future, Ranjit. And so do you, Jagadamba. But Gaurav, you haven't said anything in a while. Do you Have any questions about what we've just learned ?"

Gary : "Yes, Professor, I do have one question: Wouldn't it be simpler to learn Hindi?"

Boss

2006-12-04T10:40:00.001+05:30

A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a paper shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the CEO, "This is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?" "Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button. "Excellent, excellent" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."

Dilbert again...

2006-11-29T11:17:00.000+05:30

Dilbert in real life

2006-11-27T18:11:00.000+05:30

A magazine recently ran a Dilbert Quotes contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes from their real-life Dilbert-comic-strip-type managers. These were voted the top ten quotes from the managers we work for in corporate America, circa 2004:

1. "As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday, and employees will receive their cards in two weeks."
(This was the winning quote from Fred Dales, Microsoft Corp. in Redmond WA)

2. "What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we might encounter."
(Lykes Lines Shipping)

3. "E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business."
(Accounting manager, Electric Boat Company)

4."This project is so important we can't let things that are more important interfere with it."
(Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)

5. "Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule ."
(Plant Manager, Delco Corporation)

6."No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let you know when it's time to tell them."
(R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing/3M Corp.)

7. Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say."
(Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)

8.My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for me."
(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)

9. "We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees."
(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)

Cho Chweet

2006-11-27T18:06:00.001+05:30

Security Check

2006-11-24T10:16:00.000+05:30

Boneless Chicken

2006-11-20T15:58:00.000+05:30

Maths

2006-10-24T10:47:00.000+05:30

Kevin

2006-10-24T10:46:00.000+05:30

A woman had 8 sons all named Kevin. On asking how she managed to call one in particular She replied: That's easy. I call them by their surname !

Bad Luck

2006-10-23T11:49:00.000+05:30

Being Together

2006-10-18T13:03:00.000+05:30

Great Savings

2006-10-18T13:02:00.000+05:30

Hybrid Car

2006-10-17T10:53:00.000+05:30

Wondering

2006-10-17T10:52:00.000+05:30

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked upto the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors;green,red, orange, blue, and yellow. The old man just stared and stared. Every time the young man looked, the old man was staring. Theyoung man finallysaid sarcastically, "What's the matter old timer, never done anythingwildin your life?"Without batting an eye, the old man replied, "Got drunk once and made love with a peacock. I was wondering if you were my son."

The Brain

2006-10-17T10:36:00.000+05:30

"The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working when you get up in the morning, and doesn't stop until you get to the office."
-Robert Frost

The Only Man In The World To Have His Heart In The Abdomen!

2006-10-16T15:26:00.000+05:30

Cool Cartoon

2006-10-16T15:23:00.000+05:30

Mgmt Lesson

2006-09-28T13:45:00.000+05:30

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight,built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened - Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself.

So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John doesn't pay!"The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, "And why not?"With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a bus pass."

Innocence !!!

2006-09-28T11:29:00.000+05:30

A three-year-old walked up to a pregnant lady while waiting with hismother in the doctor's office.He inquisitively asked the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"

Shereplied, "I'm having a baby."

With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?"

She answered, "He sure is."

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?"

She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby."

With an even more surprised and shocked look he asked," Then why did youeat him?"

Banks the saviours

2006-09-27T17:38:00.000+05:30

Rajiv and Mona are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation tocelebrate their 40th anniversary.Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladiesand Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines haveCeased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, Isee an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on thebeach.However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to liveon the island for the rest of our lives!"Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on theisland.

An hour later Rajiv turns to his wife and asks, "Mona, did we pay our Rs5lakh deposit cheque yet to ICICI Bank?"
"No, sweetheart," she responds.

Rajiv, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Mona, did we payour ICICI Bank Master card yet?"
"Oh no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send the cheque," she says.

"One last thing, Mona. Did you remember to send cheques for the autoloan to them too this month?" he asks.
"Oh, forgive me, Rajiv," begged Mona. "I didn't send that one, either."

Rajiv grabs her and gives her the biggest hug in 40 years. Mona pullsaway and asks him, "So, why did you hug me?"Rajiv answers, "They'll find us"

Arrested for laughing! This is from an actual trial in the UK

2006-09-27T11:01:00.000+05:30

A young woman several months pregnant boarded a bus. She noticed ayoung man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of hercondition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing..................She had him arrested.

When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why heacted in such a manner. His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus Icouldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She first sat under anadvertisement, which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'. I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under ashaving advertisement,
which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'. Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move shesat under an advertisement, which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would haveprevented this accident.'

The case was dismissed.........!!!

Processing Speed

2006-09-26T14:41:00.000+05:30

R K Laxman Special

2006-09-26T11:42:00.000+05:30

Embarrassing Situation

2006-09-26T11:41:00.000+05:30

A very shy young man goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman
sitting alone. After an hour he gathers enough courage to go and ask her, "Er...
excuse me, but would you mind if I sat here beside you?"
She responds in a loud voice :
"NO, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!"
Everyone in the bar turns to stare at them. The young man is surprised,
shocked and embarrassed and goes back to his table.
After a few minutes the woman walks over to him smiles, apologizes,
and says, "You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how
people respond to embarrassing situations."
The young man responds loudly with,
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THREE THOUSAND RUPEES.
THATS TOO MUCH !"

Phone Bill

2006-09-26T11:39:00.000+05:30

The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting.

Dad: People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone; I use the one at the office.
Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone
Son: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile
Maid: So what is the problem? We all use our work telephones