Ambushed - 3 & 4

In sequence to my previous posts... dont know where the war will end... enjoy

Ambushed - 2

I had posted Ambushed-1 some days back and this is the addition to that

Bad luck

With a pile of 300 résumés on his desk and a need to pick someone quickly, my boss told me to make calls on the bottom 50 and toss the rest.

"Throw away 250 résumés?" I asked, shocked.

"What if the best candidates are in there?"

"You have a point," he said. "But then again, I don't need people with bad luck here."

Ambushed

Friends

Mommy Daddy

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up
something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I
took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.
"Why?" my daughter asked.
"Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's
been, it's dirty and probably has germs" I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration
and asked, "Mommy, how do you know all this stuff? You are so
smart."
I was thinking quickly. "All moms know this stuff. It's on the
Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a
Mommy."
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was
evidently pondering this new information. "OH...I get it!" she
beamed, "So if you don't pass the test you have to be the
daddy."
"Exactly" I replied back with a big smile on my face

Alcoholism

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause : Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the drink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

2. Symptom : The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause : You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause : You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your drink.

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause : You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

5. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!

6. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
Cause: You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

7. Symptom: Your wife and everyone else at home are looking funny.
Cause : You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house

Hindi Translations....

How wud sum common english sayings translate in hindi???

Have a nice day!
----- * Achcha din lo!

What's up?
----- *Uppar kya hai?

You're kidding!
----- *Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!

Don't kid me!
----- * Mera bachcha mat banaao!

Yo, baby! What's up?
-----* Beti Yo, uppar kya hai?

Cool man!
-----* Thandaa aadmi!

Check this out, man!
----* Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!

Don't mess with me, dude.
----- * Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.

She's so fine!
----- * Woh itnee baareek hai!

Listen buddy, that chick's mine, okay!?
----- * Suno dost, woh chooza mera hai, theek?

Hey good looking; what's cooking?
----* Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya pakaa rahee ho?

Are you nuts?
----- * Kya aap akhrot hain?

Son of a gun.
----- * Bachcha bandook ka.

Rock the party.
---- * Party mein patthar feko.

How do you do?
----- * Kaise karte ho?

Keep in touch!
----- * Chhoote Raho.

Lets hang out!
----- * Chalo bahar latakte hain!